Millie O’Neill
As a child, you always see your parents as these invincible super-humans. After all, they did put up with my psychologically traumatic teenage hormones at their peak. Parents want to protect you, they put on a brave face, they try to shelter you from what is dark in life. But sometimes they can’t, and sometimes, it’s important for them not to. When someone you see as so incredibly strong is forcibly made weak by disease, it’s an adjustment, to say the least. Before he got cancer, I had only seen my father fighting for me, and in that battle he was undefeated.
The poem below is about the circular patterns and routines of life, and how something as incomprehensible as cancer can put it all into perspective. Suddenly so much that was so important seems trivial. I realise what I took for granted: the moments I should have savoured; the conversations I should have had in the car on the way to school instead of glaring at a screen. Suddenly it’s a struggle to go to do simple things, like open your book in class, or maintain a bubbly and bright aura in front of peers. Everything seems superficial and inauthentic to life’s true purpose. Everyone’s complaints about minor everyday problems enrage you. When events like this give us a broader perspective, sometimes our philosophy of life changes.


Motherhood is undervalued. And I feel like my culture’s view of what a mother should be is limited. I have a sense of somehow trying to claw back a self that is individuated from my child and active in the public sphere, because the question looms: is being just a mother enough? And what constitutes a good enough mother in the face of climate change, mass extinctions and a global mental health crisis? My child must live in this world.




For the past ten years, I’ve been a physiotherapist at Mineral Springs Hospital in Banff, Alberta; Canada. Witnessing long term care residents live a mostly sedentary life did not resonate well with me. I saw the effects repeatedly: deteriorating functionality and simple lack of satisfaction with daily living. Some people would beg me to take them outside and, once there, they would lament that they were no longer able to walk around and enjoy their surroundings. Despite often severe disabilities, it was obvious that residents still craved opportunities to be active outdoors.
